Est. 1864 · Smoke. Sauce. Spirits.
The World's Most Prestigious Annual Rib Gathering
For over 160 years, the greatest minds, palates, and poker hands on the planet have converged for one singular purpose: the pursuit of the perfect rib. What began as a modest gathering of visionaries in 1864 has grown into a global institution — spoken of in hushed reverence by culinary scholars, regulatory bodies, and parking enforcement officials alike. Welcome to RibCon.
Each year, the eight Founding Members of RibCon convene at a designated venue — selected through a rigorous vetting process that takes into consideration proximity to whisky, ambient smoke levels, and poker table availability — to partake in what historians have called "probably the most important annual gathering in human history."
The Host prepares the ribs personally. This is not a potluck. This is not a casual affair. This is RibCon. The ribs are slow-cooked to perfection over many hours while members engage in spirited debate, spirited spirits, and the occasional medical incident.
Each RibCon develops its own identity, its own lore, and in several notable cases, its own name. These names are bestowed with the gravity and permanence of Olympic host cities. They are never forgotten.
Officials say the ribs prepared by Grand Pubah Slade at recent gatherings have "exceeded all known standards for excellence," prompting an emergency review of whether current RCRC regulations are sufficient to govern such extraordinary culinary achievements. Three inspectors had to be excused from the tasting panel after becoming "emotionally overwhelmed."
Municipal parking authorities have once again found themselves overwhelmed by the sheer volume of vehicles converging on the RibCon venue, sources confirmed. "We've never seen anything like it," said one official who declined to be named. "The scale of this event defies all conventional traffic modeling." Attendee count at press time: 8.
Archivists at the RibCon Heritage Institute announced this week the discovery of what they are calling "definitive proof" that RibCon was founded before the end of the Civil War, the invention of the telephone, and the formation of several sovereign nations. "The historical significance cannot be overstated," said the Institute's Director of Lore and Provenance. "RibCon was there first."
In a wide-ranging exclusive interview, founding member Stern opened up for the first time about the evening now immortalized as DeathCon — a harrowing confluence of whisky, smoke, pseudoephedrine, and gummies that required emergency intervention. "I don't remember much," Stern said, gazing into the distance. "But I remember the ribs were excellent." Medical professionals have called the incident "completely avoidable." RibCon historians have called it "legendary."
A chronicle of gatherings, incidents, and rib-related glory spanning generations of excellence.
In May of 2008 — which RibCon historians have officially designated as "Year 144 of the RibCon Era" — Grand Pubah David Slade convened the first modern gathering at his own residence. Eight founding members. One vision. Infinite ribs. What transpired that evening has been described by participants as "really fun" and "the ribs were great."
The RibCon Regulatory Commission, founded the same evening, immediately began drafting parking guidelines that remain unimplemented to this day.
Hosted by founding member Spiegler at his Norwood residence in July, the 2009 gathering produced the first and only capacity crisis in RibCon's storied history. In a moment of characteristic generosity — or perhaps catastrophic miscalculation — the guest list expanded beyond the bounds of what the venue, the parking situation, or the rib supply could sustainably accommodate.
The RibCon Regulatory Commission issued its first-ever attendance advisory. It was ignored. The ribs ran short. The lesson was learned. The gathering was nevertheless declared a success by the Grand Pubah, who noted that "enthusiasm cannot be regulated."
August 2010 found RibCon decamping to Sacramento, hosted by founding member Greenberg. The evening will be remembered not only for its exceptional ribs but for the legendary late arrival of Ayal, who appeared many hours after the gathering commenced in a state that the RibCon Medical Review Board has diplomatically described as "pre-festivitized." His entrance was theatrical. His appetite, upon arrival, was reportedly undiminished.
Hosted by founding member Biener, the 2011 gathering introduced the controversial Spare Rib variation to the RibCon canon — a decision that sparked heated debate among purists which, by all accounts, continues to this day. The evening was further distinguished by a surprise cameo appearance from Bryan's brother, who arrived, consumed an impressive quantity of ribs, and departed having made an indelible impression on the assembled membership.
In an unprecedented act of rib-related ambition, 2012 produced not one but two RibCon gatherings — a development the RibCon Regulatory Commission called "irregular," "unprecedented," and "exactly the kind of thing we were designed to prevent." The first, hosted by Stern in June, was christened Sternlaggio in his honor — a name that evokes both the Italian countryside and a man who takes his smoking program very seriously. The ribs were superb. The poker was contentious. The year's second act was still to come.
August brought the second RibCon of 2012, hosted by founding member Dinar. The Commission's objections to the dual-RibCon calendar were formally noted and formally ignored. Dinar delivered an evening of characteristic excellence: exceptional ribs, spirited poker, and the kind of camaraderie that only comes from years of shared smoke and whisky. The outdoor shot from that evening remains one of the most iconic images in the RibCon photographic archive.
Breaking with tradition in the most civilized possible way, 2013 produced the first Urban MiniCon — a scaled gathering convened at Greenberg's Denver residence. The MiniCon format acknowledged the logistical realities of adult life while refusing to abandon the core RibCon values of smoke, sauce, and spirited poker. Special recognition goes to Howie, who joined the gathering and acquitted himself with distinction. The two photos from this evening — the infamous UrbanMini group shot and the Pubah-Bryan portrait — have been corrected for proper display and now render with the dignity they deserve.
Hosted at the residence of founding member Bloom in September, the 2014 gathering achieved a level of notoriety previously unseen in RibCon's storied history. Founding member Stern — in what the RibCon Medical Review Board later called "an ambitious combination of substances" — consumed sufficient quantities of whisky, smoke, pseudoephedrine, and gummies to necessitate the involvement of emergency medical services.
The paramedics were gracious. The ribs were, by all accounts, exceptional. The ambulance shot remains the most dramatic image in the RibCon photographic canon. Stern has fully recovered and remains a founding member in good standing.
May 2015 will be remembered in RibCon lore as the year Bryan raised the bar — literally and figuratively — by procuring a dedicated rental smoker for the occasion. The results were, by unanimous consensus of the membership, the finest ribs in RibCon's modern history. The Grand Pubah himself was said to have taken careful notes. In a flourish of ceremony befitting the occasion, commemorative tokens were distributed to all attendees — a tradition the RibCon Regulatory Commission has since attempted to formalize into a mandatory practice with, predictably, no success.
Hosted by founding member Spiegler at his North Cedar Brook residence in August, the 2016 gathering produced its own chapter in RibCon lore when the host himself succumbed to a powerful and sustained vertigo episode following an enthusiastic engagement with the evening's whisky and smoke program. Spiegler reportedly spent the better part of four hours in intimate communion with the bathroom facilities of his own home.
The remaining founding members continued the gathering in his honor. The ribs were finished. The poker game proceeded. RibCon does not stop for vertigo.
June 2017 brought ZikaCon — the second Sternlaggio, now bearing the dual distinction of mosquito-themed nomenclature and particular emotional weight. This was the final RibCon before Grand Pubah Slade's departure for Spain, lending the evening a bittersweet undercurrent beneath the smoke and whisky. The mosquitoes were significant. The ribs were more significant. The gathering was a fitting farewell.
August 2018 found the Grand Pubah back stateside briefly, in between two years abroad in Spain, for a Dinar-hosted gathering that proved the institution is larger than any single member's geography. Honorary member Billy made one of his celebrated cameo appearances, arriving with characteristic timing and departing with characteristic style. The RibCon spirit, it was confirmed, is not subject to Atlantic Ocean scheduling constraints.
On September 20, 2019 — having returned from two years in Spain — Grand Pubah Slade reclaimed his smoker, his backyard, and his rightful place at the head of the RibCon table. The homecoming gathering carried the energy of a reunion and the weight of a triumphal return. The ribs were prepared with the practiced mastery of a man who had been thinking about them for two years across an ocean. They did not disappoint.
For the first time in its 156-year history, RibCon did not convene in 2020. A global pandemic — characterized by the RibCon Regulatory Commission as "an overreach by forces hostile to smoke, sauce, and in-person poker" — prevented the gathering from taking place. The Grand Pubah's smoker sat idle. The poker chips collected dust. The founding members persisted from their respective locations, awaiting the restoration of the natural order.
The Commission issued a formal statement of protest, which was sent to no one in particular and accomplished nothing, as is tradition. RibCon would return. It always does.
On Juneteenth 2021, RibCon reconvened with the full force of eighteen months of suppressed appetite. Hosted by the Grand Pubah at his residence, the gathering carried the spirit of liberation that the date demands. Honorary member Billy appeared for one of his celebrated cameos, arriving at the precise moment the ribs were ready — a coincidence so impeccable the RibCon Timing Commission is still investigating. The return was everything the founding members had hoped for, and the ribs were everything the pandemic had deprived them of.
In what the RibCon Regulatory Commission called "a troubling pattern of excess enthusiasm," 2022 produced its second dual-RibCon year. Biener hosted in April, delivering a spring gathering of genuine warmth and exceptional ribs. The Commission filed its objections. The objections were filed in the appropriate location — directly in the waste bin — and the festivities proceeded without regulatory interference.
October 2022 brought a second gathering, hosted again by Spiegler — who, in an act of either great courage or poor memory, volunteered his premises for a repeat engagement. The evening was christened VertiCon II, carrying the name with the pride of a franchise that has survived its origin story and emerged, if not entirely upright, then at least thoroughly celebrated.
June 2023 saw RibCon ascend — literally — to Spiegler's mountain house, where the thin air, spectacular views, and copious whisky combined to produce one of the more atmospheric gatherings in the institution's history. The ribs were prepared at altitude, which the RibCon Culinary Institute notes "requires significant adjustments to smoking time and temperature that Spiegler handled with characteristic mastery." MtnCon stands as proof that RibCon's reach extends to any elevation.
April 2024 brought RibCon to Greenberg's Evergreen home, nestled in the Colorado foothills in a setting that even the most jaded RibCon veteran had to acknowledge was visually exceptional. The pines. The altitude. The ribs. The combination produced an evening of rare and genuine beauty. The poker game, by contrast, was described as "typically brutal." Evergreen Con stands as one of the most picturesque gatherings in the modern era.
September 2025 returned to Biener's residence for a gathering that demonstrated, once again, that RibCon's founding members have lost none of their appetite, their capacity for whisky, or their enthusiasm for a prolonged poker session. The ribs were exceptional. The company was irreplaceable. The parking was, as always, everyone's problem.
On June 7, 2026, founding member, local Goy and affirmative action beneficiary Bryan hosted what the RibCon Culinary Institute has classified as "a significant departure from established rib protocols." The ribs — prepared with evident enthusiasm and, by all accounts, a grill set to temperatures more appropriate for the surface of Mercury — emerged in a state that even the most charitable tasting panel could only describe as "aggressively carbonized." All he had to do was finish them on the grill, and finish them he did! Less in a bbq style than in the style of a Liu Kang attack in Mortal Kombat.
The RibCon Emergency Response Committee convened within minutes. DoorDash was contemplated. The poker game proceeded. Disciplinary action is being withheld in recognition of RibCon 2015, where Bryan served up what is widely regarded as RibCon's Best Ribs! Oh how the mighty have fallen!
The gathering has been entered into the official record under all four of its earned names: CharCon, CoalCon, CinderCon, and CarbonCon. The RibCon Naming Commission notes that no previous gathering has required four names, and that this is both a mark of distinction and a cautionary tale.
Select a year to browse the photographic record. Click any photo to enlarge.
Every RibCon concludes with the Poker Conclave — the event that separates the merely excellent evening from the truly legendary one. The game of choice is Omaha Hi-Lo, a split-pot game of strategy, patience, and occasional heartbreak. New to the table? Here is everything you need to know.
Omaha Hi-Lo (also called Omaha 8-or-Better) is a split-pot poker game where the best high hand and the best low hand divide the pot equally.
The best outcome in Omaha Hi-Lo is to scoop — win both the high and low halves of the pot simultaneously. The classic scoop hand is The Wheel (A-2-3-4-5): the best possible low hand AND a straight, giving it a chance to win both halves. A low hand that is also a flush or straight gives you the best chance of scooping.
Low hands are ranked by reading the cards from highest to lowest — think of them as a number read from left to right. The smaller the number, the better the low hand.
| Hand (low to high) | Read as a Number | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| A-2-3-4-5 Best | 12,345 | The Wheel — best possible low AND a straight. Prime scoop hand. |
| A-2-3-4-6 | 12,346 | Second best low possible |
| A-2-3-4-7 | 12,347 | Third best low possible |
| A-2-3-4-8 | 12,348 | Still very strong — beats any A-2-3-5 hand |
| A-2-3-5-6 | 12,356 | A-2 hands always beat A-3 hands, even with higher cards elsewhere |
| A-2-3-5-7 | 12,357 | Still an A-2 hand — very strong |
| A-2-5-6-7 | 12,567 | Beats A-3-4-5-6 because 12,567 < 13,456 |
| A-2-6-7-8 | 12,678 | Weakest A-2 low — still beats any A-3 hand |
| A-3-4-5-6 | 13,456 | Best A-3 hand — loses to any A-2 hand |
| A-3-4-5-7 | 13,457 | Good low but loses to all A-2 hands |
| A-3-5-6-8 | 13,568 | Weaker A-3 hand |
| A-4-5-6-7 | 14,567 | Best A-4 hand — loses to all A-2 and A-3 hands |
| 2-3-4-5-6 | 23,456 | No ace — loses to all hands with an ace |
| 3-4-5-6-7 | 34,567 | Weak low — qualifies but loses to nearly everything |
| 4-5-6-7-8 | 45,678 | Weakest qualifying low hand |
| Any hand with a 9, 10, J, Q, or K | — | Does not qualify as a low hand |
Eight individuals, bound by smoke, sauce, and spirits. Selected not through application or merit, but through the inscrutable wisdom of the Grand Pubah. Their identities are known. Their capacity for ribs is legendary. Their parking remains everyone's problem.